accentuate the positive

as i've mentioned in a previous post, i spend a LOT of time in the car. whether it's driving too and from client appointments, carpooling, or just the mundane errands, many hours are spent behind the wheel on these wonderful Chicagoland expressways. i appreciate the mornings because i love to get my cry-inducing holler on listening to Steve Harvey and his antics, but the afternoons are not that great. having not purchased any new music lately (i REALLY need to invest in sattelite radio!), i've been bored in that arena as well. so, scanning the AM stations last week looking for some decent talk radio, i came across Relevant Radio, a Catholic-based talk radio station and my new homeboy Drew Mariotti who has a show during the afternoons when i am driving to pick up PC.

all this week, they've been talking about the topic of angels and how God uses angels to protect us, guide us, and to walk with us. many ppl were calling into the show sharing their stories about encounters with angels, and he even had an expert on the show who is an "angel expert" and offered up a lot of theological commentary (backed with Scripture) about the importance of angels in fulfilling God's work on earth--i was enlightened! i have always believed in angels--not only as protection and guidance, but also to teach us things. i thought about this last night as i had an encounter with an "angel" who in a 2 hr conversation, reminded me (once again) about what matters most.

a sorority sister of mine that i have never met called me last night to make arrangements to pick up some gently-used baby items that i am giving away. she responded to a posting that i made on a listserv, and we had been emailing back and forth for a couple of weeks, and she called last nite to make concrete plans. when she called, it was about 15 mins into the debate, and though i am dead-tired of all of the political hullabaloo and want Election Day to come and go as quickly as possible, i made plans to watch. when the phone rang, i figured it would be short and sweet. needless to say, it ended up being a 2+hr convo, and i didn't see much of the debate. but i ain't even mad.

why? because i entertained an angel unaware.

this Soror and i go to the same church, so we exchanged stories about that, as well as family, kids, career, sorority-stuff, etc. and, in the midst of talking, she told me that she was a FOUR time cancer survivor. yes, you read that right---FOUR times she's been diagnosed (and re-diagnosed) with ovarian and cervical cancer--gone thru radiation and chemo--and beaten it.

and, she's only in her mid-30s, having suffered through her first bout as an undergraduate.

as i listened to her tell me her story, including the fact that she just finished a most recent round of chemo this past February and is due for another checkup in a few months, she did it with grace, laughter, and a wicked sense of humor! she talked about losing her hair, looking for wigs, and how it has grown back longer and thicker than it ever was. she spoke about the wonderful doctors she's had and how her Sorors and friends carried her through her treatments, including when she was in undergrad and was hundreds of miles away from home. she laughed as she talked about how some doctors told her that she was "foolish" to pray for recovery and that she would never have children, and how her current doctor prides himself on being able to "help" his cancer-survivor patients conceive. i was listening to the conversation in awe, thinking to myself "wow! i don't know if i could do it!"

when i decided to make a choice to have PC and continue living here, in a city where i had no [blood] familial support, ppl said to me "i don't know how you do it!" and tho it's not easy and there are many times when the thought crosses my mind to move, there are many more reasons why i stay. and i am living proof that it can be done, thru God's help and with support of wonderful "chosen" family. as i listened to Chatty Patty's story last nite i thought to myself "i don't know if i could do it!" and it put a lot of things into perspective for me, hence why i say she was an angel, sent to remind me of what really matters.

everyone you meet is fighting some sort of battle/bearing some sort of cross--whether it's family issues, health, finance, spiritual, relational, whatever--we're all dealing thru something. we have good days and not-so-good days, but our responses to these issues can have a profound effect on how we come out on the other end, even if the end isn't perfect. there is a quote that speaks about being kinder than we think is necessary to ppl, because everyone is fighting some sort of battle. i've seen that topic expounded in with respects to blowing the horn at someone who doesn't realize the light turned has green. do we ever stop think why that person may have been distracted? what bit of news that they received that day? what hell they might be going home to? we just never know...

so my challenge for myself and for my readers is that we continue to grow into ppl that accentuate the positive--ppl that look for the silver lining in every situation. of course, it is easier said than done, especially when life, with all of its queer twists and turns, has us spiraling into a place of stress, sadness, anxiety, or frustration. always remember, somewhere somebody has it worse than you do, atleast from the perspective of what you can handle. i believe that the crosses we are given to bear are those that He has determined that we can handle, if we'll just lean on and trust Him.

now, go dust off those wings and be an angel to someone you meet along the way!